jealousy control

There is such a thing as too much jealousy..

 

If your partner accuses you of flirting with every guy you talk to, that’s not okay. A partner who is too jealous will read into everything, whether it’s the smile you gave the server or the conversation you were having with a guy/women you’ve been friends with for years. That’s not cool. Again, you’re allowed to talk to the opposite sex even if you are in a committed relationship- and they shouldn’t be constantly accusing you of something else.

With that being said, if you set the appropriate boundaries, such as not calling the opposite other at odd hours of the night or sneaking off to meet with them, without your partner knowing, then you will be ok…

If your partner freaks out if you don’t answer their texts and calls you 15 times in a matter of 30 minutes, then something may be wrong. Does your partner want to know about every moment of your day after you go hang out with your friends? That means that they are trying to keep track of you. If your partner picks at you about what you can and cannot wear, whether it is revealing or not, there is a trust issue. Lastly, if your partner always accuses you of lying despite the fact that you’ve never given them a reason to feel this way, they are too jealous. Too much jealousy can make you feel imprisoned. If you feel as though you are in a constant cloud of suspicion, something is wrong?

It isn’t the outfit you chose to wear, or your bubbly personality, it is his demand for complete possession that is making him act so crazy. Here is how you can handle them…

  1. Let them know that you love them, he/she may be jealous because the relationship is new and they are a bit insecure about your feelings for them.
  2. Give them more attention when you are around others of the opposite sex. Both women and men are competitive, sometimes it is about winning against the opposition. This attention will make your partner feel good about the relationship.
  3. Include them in social activities. Jealous partners can create illusions in their mind when they are feeling threatened. Do this for a few months, let them realize on their own that you are not on a flirting spree every time you go out.
  4. Check in and call your partner. Sometimes a little reassurance can go a long way. Call them every now and then and have a quiet conversation without getting distracted by your friends.

If your partner’s jealousy is constant, debilitating and oppressive— it is time to seek help! If you feel worthless and unimportant, frustrated, overwhelmed, and have less sexual intimacy then you are in an unhealthy relationship. Just remember that popular scripture…Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres…..

Myers life coaching Gulfport MS 2015-08-22_1532

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