Without knowing or meaning to, there are things we do that fuel our anger!
- Guilt- After the anger, comes the guilt. Your guilt skyrockets when you have to apologize to girlfriend, family members or friends over something you said while you were angry. As a result we try to justify why we are right and the other person is wrong. This fuels the anger. Do not feel guilty for experiencing a natural biological response to a threat! Just take it as a learning experience and work towards developing self-control!
- Blame- Instead of taking responsibility, we place the blame on whatever made us angry. This is a natural reaction to blame someone else or even blame ourselves. For the brain to comprehend new beliefs or change existing ones, it has to create new pathways, which takes time. You know the wrinkles in our brains are actually pathways formed from what we have learned. The trick to integrating new beliefs into your life is to think of it as learning how to play an instrument. In the beginning stages you will make numerous mistakes. However, the more you practice, the easier it becomes.
- Fear- When we are in fear of “blowing it,” we are more likely to explode. When we suppress anger, we are always on the lookout for scenes or scenarios that would trigger that anger experienced during previous blow ups. The brain translates this into a “movie” of all the scenes, real and imagined that would make us blow our anger out of proportion. This then multiplies the chances of us exploding. Do not fear anger, identify your emotions, seek some support, and aim for self-control!
The Journal of Behavioral Science (2015) launched a report and found…
- Nearly 9% of people in the United States have outbursts of anger, break or smash things, or get into physical fights — and have access to a firearm,
- 1.5% of people who have these anger issues carry their guns outside the home.
What is anger? Anger is an emotion caused by feelings of helplessness and the need to control situations, people and consequences. Anger—when expressed in healthy way—you can foster personal growth, improving relationships and changing your life.
How would your life be different if you were to respond to anger in a healthy way?