5 Awesome Dating Tips for Single Ladies
Do you have issues with getting or keeping a good boyfriend? Is it easier to stay single? Do you let boys in only to step on your heart or just not let them in at all? Are all of your friends pairing up except you? Do your friends give you the worst dating tips/advice?
Don’t feel bad, you’re not alone!
A lot of women have trouble finding the right guy. We get all kinds of signals from different places that we should act like this and find a guy like that—it can all be difficult to sort through!
We also often find ourselves in cycles, where no matter what we do, we end up dating the same jerk over and over. It’s not fair!
Well, the good news is, there is something you can do about it! You can change your dating habits and you can be on your way to finding Mister Right. Living in a larger city like Las Vegas makes it even harder to find a partner.
Well, this article is going to give you 5 amazing tips to help you to better yourself and find the good, decent, funny and the kind man you deserve!
Tips # 1: Find People You Like at the Places You Like
Where do you think to go when you’re thinking about finding a new boyfriend? Most people immediately think of a bar or club. In a big party town like Las Vegas, this is the norm!
Although you can find someone at a bar or a club, unless your hobbies are drinking craft beer or DJing, you probably won’t find the right person at these venues.
Let’s be honest here, people go to clubs to have a good time and occasionally to that Las Vegas hook up. The atmosphere isn’t conducive to finding your soul-mate, it’s built for bumping and grinding.
You can’t talk, you can’t hear other people, the drinks are expensive, everyone is dressed in short, tight dresses…is this really where you expect to meet your future husband?
Sure, a lot of people meet in school and it’s hard to meet people after you graduate or if you didn’t go, but don’t fret! There are alternative ways to meet men that are just as good.
First, think about what you like to do. Let’s say you’re a little quirky and you like things like dodge ball. Join a local dodge ball league!
If you like art, go to some galleries or join a local art group. If you are into writing, see if you can find a writing workshop.
These kinds of social activities bring like-minded people together to do what they love. This increases your chances of finding someone like you who you may be interested in or at least joining a social circle with other like-minded people.
The more active you are and the more you get out there and do what you love, the better chances you will have of finding the right person.
This works in two ways.
- The first way I already mentioned, you become involved with people with similar interest and expand your network. Maybe you don’t fancy anyone in your pottery class, but you may go out with a friend from class and meet one of their friends who you hit it off with.
- The other way is that when you do what you love, your real beauty can shine through. You are happy, your guard is down and people can learn to love you at your best. This makes you even more attractive than you usually are!
- One last consideration for meeting people outside of bars and clubs is taking some courses at your local college or community college.
What? Take classes? How will that help?
Just being on a college campus will help you to meet other intelligent people who are trying to better themselves. Mix that with taking some courses you are interested in and POW, you could meet Mister Right.
If you want to get a degree, that’s awesome, but I’m more talking about taking courses in things that fascinate you. If you’ve always wanted to learn about photography, this would be the perfect time!
Really, you’re killing two lovebirds with one stone. You’re learning more about your passion and you’re meeting people who love what you love. Double win!
Tip # 2: Don’t Fear the Internet
What do you think of when you think of online dating. Now be honest!
If you aren’t already on online dating, you may think of something like this:
- Social rejects
- Old people
- People who can’t get a real date
- Shy people
- Shallow people
- People just looking to hook up
The sad thing is, you couldn’t be farther from the truth!
There are plenty of people who go out and meet people in real life who use online dating as an additional tool or who love how it narrows down the dating pool.
In the physical world, you meet people based on physical attraction and whatever flair they have on. Oh, I know that band or cool bracelet!
Online, you have the luxury of reading about them. You can learn what they like and dislike, what their values and stances are…you can learn more about them in five minutes then from a two hour conversation!
Now, figuring out how they are socially can be tricky online. Sometimes you have to meet them in person to find out. The bright side is that you already know so much about them and have probably spoken, so you can forgive some shyness.
There are great matches out there for you that you may have never considered in real life, but once you join online dating you are able to find.
The sad thing about the physical world is that one little insignificant thing can turn us off to potential boyfriends. How crappy is that?
You could literally be approached by someone who is PERFECT for you, who loves all the same things, has the same views and is super kind, but you could blow them off because you are busy chatting up some hunky blonde idiot.
With online dating, this isn’t an issue. You meet and communicate at your own speed and when you feel the time is right, you set up the date.
Sounds like a pretty cool system, right? That’s because it is. It’s designed to be simple and effective. Take advantage of it!
Tip # 3: Act Like a Lady, Be Treated Like a Lady
Sometimes you have bad luck. Sometimes you go out and every guy you meet is a jerk with only one thing on their mind. The problem is, that’s more rare than you’d think.
Believe it or not, there may have been a lot of great guys at the bar or club you went to. The problem may have been that YOU gave off the wrong vibe.
Certain behaviors have begun to loosen up as the line between the sexes has begun to blur. Now, don’t get me wrong, you should be strong and independent, but being equal doesn’t mean acting like a guy.
I have no idea why, but for some reason girls have begun to think it’s okay to burp, spit and worse! I understand wanting to get along, but if you act like “one of the guys,” what do you think they’re going to treat you like?
That’s right, one of the guys!
If guys see you as an equal, yeah, they’ll think you’re “cool” and “fun to party with,” but they’ll never want to date you.
If you ARE able to find a guy who will date you when you’re acting like this, WATCH OUT. This is usually the kind of guy you don’t WANT to date.
There are two types of guys who date girls like this:
- Guys who are immature.
- Guys who are desperate.
Neither one of these guys is ready for a healthy, adult relationship.
Immature guys can be fun and spontaneous, but they are also lazy and don’t have direction. Guys who are desperate will do anything to please you, but they’ll do anything to please anyone else as well, because they’re desperate.
Immature guys are generally leeches and desperate guys are usually clingy. Two traits that aren’t good for a healthy, real relationship.
Look, we all want to be liked and we all want to be accepted. The truth of the matter is, though, that trying to act like a man to get a man will get you nowhere.
A real man (and when I say “man” I mean MAN, not BOY) doesn’t want another man. If he does, he won’t be attracted to you no matter what you do, because he doesn’t swing that way.
A REAL man wants a LADY. He wants a real WOMEN that he can connect with on a higher level. The kind of man you want to date is reliable, humble, kind, goal-oriented and confident.
That kind of man wants a lady who treats herself well and is proper. This doesn’t mean you can’t be yourself and can’t like “male” things like sports and video games, it just means that you have to act like a lady.
Be strong, confident and powerful. Walk with your back straight, take deliberate steps and go after what you want. This is what a strong women does.
Also, don’t be gross and avoid being vulgar. Sure, some men are vulgar as well, but as a general rule, he doesn’t want to hear about your lady parts or your bathroom habits.
What is comes down to is being classy.
Tip # 4: Beware of “Bad Boys”
Remember when you were a girl and you saw a guy with tattered jeans and an awesome jacket who was smoking, super cool, leaning on a building with a “No Smoking” sign?
Now, as an adult women, that guy looks like a jackass, but when you were younger, he was super cute!
The same thing exists in the adult world, it just usually isn’t as obvious. “Bad Boys” are still out there, they are just better at hiding it now.
Trust me, the blatant disregard for the law in public may have changed, but their attitude hasn’t! They still don’t care about what people think, which is still attractive, but in the wrong way.
We are hardwired to find “Bad Boys” attractive because they have “Alpha Male” written all over them. Even if you don’t buy that macho, football player crap, there are still other ways they can show their “dominance.”
This is usually by disrespecting other people, not having empathy or decency and not caring about you. Super cool alpha male becomes less cool when you have a pregnancy test and he won’t support you or when you are trying to pursue your career and he is holding you back.
This isn’t to say you have to date a chump! There is a middle ground where you find a real gentleman.
Here are the similarities of bad boys and gentlemen:
- Not caring what others think
- Marching to the beat of their own drum
- Taking risks
- Being confident
- Being manly
- Not being afraid of the opposite sex
- Never letting anyone intimidate them
Now, here are the differences:
- A gentlemen knows when to let something go and be smart about a situation, a bad boy doesn’t
- A gentleman may not care what others think, but he respects their opinions. A bad boy doesn’t respect anyone
- A gentleman is not afraid of the opposite sex, but he doesn’t use this as an excuse to treat women like garbage. A bad boy treats you like a toy or piece of meat
- A gentlemen takes calculated risks and works hard for what they want. A bad boy takes stupid risks because they are a child
The list could really go on forever.
Bad boys are what we date when secretly we think we don’t deserve better. If you have self-respect and know your worth, you will avoid these guys. They use you for what they need and give you the boot.
A gentleman is a REAL man, who walks with a straight back, but doesn’t puff their chest out. A Gentleman is strong, but touches with soft hands. A gentleman can show their weaknesses without letting those weaknesses define them.
This is the man you want and this is the man you DESERVE.
Tips # 5: Respect Yourself
Respect has to be earned. Others will respect you when you act in a way that shows you deserve respect.
Also, in order for people to respect you, they have to know you respect yourself. This doesn’t mean wearing a TV that says “I love me!” on it, but acting in a way that shows strength.
Always beating up on yourself and accepting the bare minimum in life does not show that you respect yourself.
How can you expect a man to respect you if you don’t respect yourself?
Respecting yourself and being a lady have a lot to do with each other. There are certain aspects of both being a lady and having self-respect that mix and make you attractive.
I don’t mean attractive in the swimsuit model kind of way and that is what most girls mix up. Wearing skimpy, small clothing doesn’t make you attractive in the way you are looking for.
Sure, if you are looking for something short lasting and physical, a low cut shirt and short shorts work wonders. If you are looking for Mister Right, you have to show class and depth.
I’m not a prude and I’m in NO WAY old-fashioned, but I am a huge believer that real sexiness is leaving something to the imagination.
It’s in the way you walk, in the way you speak, in how you hold yourself…sexiness is having all of the power that comes with being a women and releasing it in short bursts.
If you turn your stereo all the way up all the time, you’ll never know what dynamics are. You have to master subtlety to know when to turn up the volume.
This kind of control comes from loving and respecting yourself. That and a lot of practice! Being a sensual and remarkable women doesn’t happen overnight.
You may have to work towards consciously changing some bad habits and they may be difficult to break, but it’ll be worth it.
I want you to do something for me. Every day, for a month, I want you to wake up in the morning and before you put on makeup or do your hair, I want you to say to yourself in the mirror, “You are beautiful. You are perfect. I love you, unconditionally.”
This is the most real and true love. You have to truly love yourself to respect yourself and you have to love yourself if you want anyone else to love you.
When you respect yourself, you will expect respect from other people and those who don’t show it to you will have to take a hike!